I think I attract awkwardness. I know everyone experiences awkward moments, but sometimes I feel like I have an unusual amount of awkward things happen to me. Back when I lived in the Devonshire student housing (Provo), I had one of the most awkward experiences of my life. I told my friend Sara Soda what happened and she thought it was so funny that I ended up re-telling this story many times to different people in the ward and it became a popular request in story telling time and was referred to as "The Peter Porn Story". Don't let that title stop you from reading.... nothing bad happened, but you will understand why Sara named it that when I finish the story. During this time I was creating and filming many music video's with my friends, and so my story begins...
The beginning of April 2006, I began creating and filming the music video for "Vibeology" by Paula Abdul. I had just finished filming my friend Sydney in the teacher scene when I get a phone call from Peter in the ward.
Peter: "Hey, my roommate told me that you had the video camera. When your done using it, can you bring it by my apartment? I really need to film something"
Me: "You know Peter, we are going to use this whole tape for our video. Can't you just wait a couple of days when we have finished all of the filming?"
Peter: "No, no. I HAVE to film this TODAY. So just drop it off when your done and you can have it back tonight."
So after I am done filming, I walk back to the Devonshire to Peter's apartment to give him the video camera. He opens the door and comes out and starts walking down the hall.
Peter: "My roommates are gone, so you are going to have to film, follow me."
For some reason (probably just caught off guard) I don't ask questions and continue following Peter out of the Devonshire and out to the parking lot right by the Old Academy (the neighboring apartment complex in our ward). He then stops by a small patch of snow on the ground next to the apartment complex. At this point Peter had still not explained anything to me.
Peter: "Do you know how to work the camera?"
Me: "Umm, well ya, I just got done filming a scene to my music video"
I don't know why it was so hard for me to ask him what he was filming, maybe it is because I was afraid of the answer he would give me. Lets be honest, as nice as Peter was... he always weirded me out. Bless his heart. No matter what the weather, he always wore a t-shirt, shorts and no shoes. He had a shaved head and never said much... just stared at people and give weird looks. When he did talk to people, it was always awkward. Poor guy. Anyway, I FINALLY asked..
Me: "Peter, what am I going to be filming you doing?"
Peter: "Don't worry about it."
Me: "Um.. what?" *That statement DID make me worry*
Just then he took off his shirt. I was just praying nobody would walk by and think this was for my music video. (although the story was told so many times... that a tiny clip did end up in the beginning of the music video) After he took off his shirt he was starting to take off his shorts and I started to panic.
Me: "Peter! What are you doing?!"
Peter: "Don't worry about it."
Now he was just standing there in those tiny boxer shorts. I was super creeped out.
Peter: "Okay, start filming..."
He was now laying down in this little patch of snow and rolling around in it and rubbing the snow on himself. I think I filmed for about 30 seconds before I told him that was enough. I couldn't believe I even filmed that much. I didn't know what to do, so I kept going along with everything, but I couldn't take anymore. Before he could even get back up off of the ground I set the video camera on the ground and I literally RAN back to my apartment. I didn't even look back at all. It was too awkward and weird.
I saw him the next day and he tried to apologize for how weird it was and why he was filming what he was, but I wouldn't let him. I just cut him off and told him that I didn't ever want to talk about it again. Later his roommate (the one who edits my video's and owns the camera) told me that he wanted to make his own music video to a song by "Moosebutter". I'm not sure if that makes the whole situation better or even more weird.
Random side note. I actually met some of the guys from "Moosebutter" and told them this story. They thought it was pretty funny and considered writing a song about it. They didn't end up doing that, but they did make up a song about me and sing it to me that night.