Confessions of a Brunette on the Internet 279

Another short week at work, which is SO nice. I worked Monday and Tuesday and then Wednesday morning I left in the morning to road trip to Arizona with the family. I drove my parents in my snazzy new car that I love and caravaned with Jamie and Dan. The drive was really beautiful. We drove through a flash flood and some awesome lighting and thunder storms. I didn't mind until the rain came down so hard that I couldn't see the road... that always gives me a little bit of anxiety. We made it though and the weather in Williams Arizona is perfect. Nice break from the heat that we have had in Utah.

I finished Heroes. It was pretty good. I enjoyed it. I still like the 1st season the best. The other 3 were ok. I am thinking of watching Arrow next since it only has 2 seasons and the show is over. My brother told me to watch it. He really liked it, so I'm sure I will like it too. Plus the main character is good looking. That's always a plus.

Still looking for a new roommate. I have given up on finding someone that I really think I would be friends with and just finding something to fill the spot. I think it will fill soon because it is getting closer and closer to when contracts are up and people need to decided on their new place. We will see. It has been nice just having MacKenzie and I in the house though. 4 gets a little crowded sometimes.

I like my fish tank, but I feel like I am still doing something wrong. Some things are doing great and other things I can't keep alive. I am trying to decide if I should give up or keep trying. I love my fish tank... but I just hate that it isn't thriving the way I want it to and the way I see others doing. I just wish I really knew what I was doing and could fix whatever it is that is wrong. Maybe I should pass it off to my fish nerd cousin for a little while and have him get it to the way it should be... then take it back. Ha ha. I don't know. I need to chat with him.

I still can't believe my family is all on vacation together. This never happens outsides one of the family members houses. It's nice. I love being with my family... but at the same time it's hard. It's really hard for me to feel like I have a place there. That is mostly my own doing and not anyone else but everything is based around families. I don't have one. So I just feel like... I'm there off to the side trying to figure out what to do. I try really hard not to feel this way because I love my family and being with my family... but the older I get, the harder it becomes. I think that is why I focus on doing so much with my friends. It's not that I try and put my friends before my family. It's just easier with my friends. We are all in the same situation. We all relate. We all fend for ourselves but have fun together. I don't know how else to explain it. Regardless... it was still nice to be with my family for a couple of days and fun to see the kids play together. It's nice. I wish we all lived closer together.

I'm still struggling with weight loss. It's frustrating. Sometimes I feel like I just want to stop eating... but then that is miserable. I just wish it came off easier. I wish I loved exercise more or found exercise that I loved doing. It's all a pain though. I'm plenty active. I have been hiking a lot and walking and adventuring outside. It's a constant battle unfortunately. I have been really good at keeping to my calories on My Fitness Pal and I just really thought that I would have made more progress by now. Ugh. I hate it.

I have seriously been considering buying a paddle board. Especially since my dad offered me storage space at his business. That would mean that I need to put racks on top of my car. Still not sure why my car didn't come with them since I got the car with all of the bells and whistles. I may just buy them online and have my dad put them on. I should get them even if I don't buy a paddle board... I need it ready for adventures. It would be fun to have a paddle board though and just go whenever I feel like it. I just wish Paddle Boards were not so expensive.

I also am thinking about my next trip. There are a few offers on the table. 3 different guys. 3 different locations. Are guys more into traveling than girls or something? What is with this? I don't care. I'll take what I can get. One trip would be with my friend Stacey. He is a blast and I think we would have the time of our lives traveling together, plus he knows the language because he served his mission to where we would be going. I would get to see another wonder of the world. I want to go there... but it's not SUPER high on my list. I would also miss Christmas with my family... which lately, I don't know if I would hate missing my birthday and Christmas. Goes back to the hard being the only single one in the family issue.  Another offer is with my friend Daniel. He is willing to go pretty much anywhere that I want to go and we would probably go in November. We have traveled together before and know that we get along well so no worries there. It would fun to go somewhere higher on my list. Let's be honest though... I want to go everywhere, so it doesn't really matter the order I go in. The last offer is from a guy that I don't know very well... but at the same time, that is kind of exciting. We seem to get along well so far. He wants to go somewhere that I have been trying to find someone to go with me to for the last 3 years. So that excites me. Two of them seem pretty serious... not sure about the other one. So, I guess I will make my decision as time goes on and things pan out. I'm excited over the idea of planning another trip though. I like having trips to look forward to... if you couldn't tell.

Anyway... that is all for me. Another week in the life of Tracy.