Mr. Always Comes Back

When I first got on Tinder, I matched with this guy and we started chatting. We soon figured out that we were not in the same state. He happened to be in Utah when I left to go on a cruise. We had just missed each other. He lives in Alaska. It is usually at that point where both people don't see the point and they both stop talking and move on. That didn't happen with this guy. We started talking regularly and he called me a few times and we chatted. I never really thought it would go anywhere and I didn't care for it to... I just enjoy talking and people and I thought he was kind of cute (at least the pictures he had on Tinder).

This went on for months... I was dating a lot of other guys and I didn't care but I enjoyed our chats. The more I got to know him the more sensitive I figured out he was and it didn't take much to set him off. He would tell me I was good wife material and I couldn't say anything back because we had never met and that is weird to me. I knew him a little by chatting... but you don't really know a person you have never met. It's different. I feel like with Internet dating... people fall in love with the idea of someone, and I really felt that is what he was doing with me. He was then telling me I needed to go out to Alaska to spend the week with him so we could see if something was there and he would pay for half my ticket... and I just couldn't do it. It sounded crazy to me. I did tell him though that next time he was in Utah that I would love to go out with him. He didn't like this answer. He felt like I was rejecting him or maybe he just didn't see the point because he liked me more than I liked him... I don't know. Soon after that he stopped texting me and I would try writing him on Facebook to say hi when I saw him online and he didn't answer and then he deleted me. I thought... ok... oh well... I didn't care too much, shortly after I started dating John.

Half a year goes by. I all of the sudden hear from him again. I should have ignored him, but I was too nice. I asked him why the long absence and why contact me again? He said he didn't see the point in trying to start anything long distance, but then he missed me and just really wanted to talk to me again and then asked me if we could talk again. I said sure. We chatted for a little while, but then he would send me inappropriate jokes that I didn't find funny and I would tell him that and then he would reply "sorry, I won't bother you again" and I would tell him he was being too dramatic and he wouldn't respond. This is when I really realized how emotionally unstable he was. Why did he care so much about what I said and though when we had never met and didn't really even keep in touch for most of the year?

Then a few weeks goes by and he would ask me if it bothered me if he can't stop staring at my pictures. How do you respond to that? Then he would ask me if I wanted to know what else my pictures did to him... trying to be dirty again. I would say no and he respected that for the time being because he "didn't want to lose me".  He doesn't really have me, so I don't know how he is going to lose me. Along with dirty humor text... I would also get lots of selfies of him trying to be sexy. When guys do that, to me it screams insecure. He would also send me song lyrics. It was all a little too weird to me. Here is an example of texts I would get from him.

"Want to know what I'm thinking about? Oh.... stuff. Work, sex, selling my truck, the weekend, sex, how I like this new phone case, how I like your picture... then sex again... "

Yep, classy. After that we would stop talking again.... which I was totally fine with. In fact I was always really happy when he stopped texting me. It was no longer fun to talk to him.

3 months goes by and I forgot about him honestly... until today when I got another text from him.

Mr. Always Comes Back : "What's up Tracy?"

Me : "Hey, how are you?"

Mr. Always Comes Back: "I'm good. At work this week. What's new?"

Me: " Since we last talked? Went to Italy & Greece, dating, shopping for a new car... you?"

Mr. Always Comes Back: " Well nothing as exciting as going to Italy and Greece. I started a new job and I started seeing this girl who lives in St. George.... so difficulties with that are pretty obvious. She's coming up for Thanksgiving and we are gonna decide what to do."

Me: "Sounds like life is going great for you. If you are happy in a relationship, why are you texting me?"

Mr. Always Comes Back: "A few days ago I couldn't get you out of my head. So maybe that was it"

Me: "Couldn't get me out of your head?!!!"
*I'm feeling creeped out because I forgot about him and never think about him. I have too many other guys to think about*

Mr. Always Comes Back: "Happens quite often"

Me: "Why? We never even met. You are dating another girl, you should be thinking about her"

Mr. Always Comes Back: "I just can't help but to have this incredible attraction to you... despite my best efforts not to. And I guess I'll always wonder what if."

Yikes...  All I can say is that I hope things go really well when the girlfriend comes out for Thanksgiving and he moves on, because it isn't ever going to happen for us. Sorry Mr. Always Comes Back....