My friend decided to set me up on a blind date. Well... it wasn't totally blind. He had added me on facebook first, so I saw what he looked like. I wasn't super attracted to him, but sometimes personality can make all the difference. He had been texting me and seemed really funny, so I was still excited to meet him.
We text for a few days, then he asked me if he could call me. I said sure and we talked on the phone to get to know each other a little bit and so that we could set up a date for that week. Well... conversation wasn't great on the phone. It didn't flow naturally, there were awkward silences where I said I should probably go, but then he kept talking about nothing. I would fish for things to talk about and then he would talk over me. He told me all about his divorce in detail. I was really hoping that this was not an indicator for how our date was going to be. I was hoping that MAYBE he was just nervous on the phone or something.
Our date came. He picked me up and right away... it was happening. The awkward silence where I felt like I was trying to get conversation going. I'm asking how his day went. That didn't go far. I asked him to tell me more about him and he responded with "what do you want to know". This was just in the car on the way to dinner. I realized it wasn't just on the phone... this was the way he is.
I finally got him talking to where conversation flowed at dinner. However he would still talk over me... and when he was done I would say "so anyways... as I was saying" ha ha. I HATE it when people talk over me... like whatever they have to say is more important than what I was talking about. I was starting to enjoy conversation until Mr. Bad Conversationalist started talking about work....
Mr. Bad Conversationalist - "Girls are drama, and they just have this need to be talking all of the time. Conversation is so important to them. Guys can be together and just sit in silence and be happy. We don't need to have conversations with each other"
*I'm pretty sure this isn't true. Even when guys are together, I know they need conversation. Everyone does! However, I'm starting to feel like our conversation is a burden to him... especially since he sucks at it*
Me - "Oh, so is it just a pain to have to have conversations with girls?"
Mr. Bad Conversationalist - "No, because girls have boobs"
Me - * nervous laughter... I have no words for that comment*
Isn't it a given that you don't talk about that kind of stuff on dates... especially a first date with someone you don't really know? Maybe it's just me?
After dinner he wanted to go to the park and talk. I didn't really want to, but figured whatever. At the park, he brought up boobs one more time. What did this do? Just made me self conscious that my boobs were the only thing he was thinking about on this date. I wasn't impressed by this... that's for sure.
He was a nice guy... and I can see how he would probably different at work (which is why my friend wanted to set me up) but... being a 37 year old that had been married before and been in relationships since his divorce... I just expected that he would know how to have good conversation and know that it is not ok to talk about boobs on the first date.
On a positive note... my friend Rich and I were talking about dating a little while ago... and he wanted to make sure I had a good next date and if I didn't he volunteered to dress up like a Genie and grant me wishes. Let me remind you that this was his idea and not mine... but I agreed to it thinking I rarely have a bad date. He wanted to set me up so that he made sure I had a good date, but that double date fell through and this one happened next. I look forward to seeing Rich dressed up like a Genie. :)
We text for a few days, then he asked me if he could call me. I said sure and we talked on the phone to get to know each other a little bit and so that we could set up a date for that week. Well... conversation wasn't great on the phone. It didn't flow naturally, there were awkward silences where I said I should probably go, but then he kept talking about nothing. I would fish for things to talk about and then he would talk over me. He told me all about his divorce in detail. I was really hoping that this was not an indicator for how our date was going to be. I was hoping that MAYBE he was just nervous on the phone or something.
Our date came. He picked me up and right away... it was happening. The awkward silence where I felt like I was trying to get conversation going. I'm asking how his day went. That didn't go far. I asked him to tell me more about him and he responded with "what do you want to know". This was just in the car on the way to dinner. I realized it wasn't just on the phone... this was the way he is.
I finally got him talking to where conversation flowed at dinner. However he would still talk over me... and when he was done I would say "so anyways... as I was saying" ha ha. I HATE it when people talk over me... like whatever they have to say is more important than what I was talking about. I was starting to enjoy conversation until Mr. Bad Conversationalist started talking about work....
Mr. Bad Conversationalist - "Girls are drama, and they just have this need to be talking all of the time. Conversation is so important to them. Guys can be together and just sit in silence and be happy. We don't need to have conversations with each other"
*I'm pretty sure this isn't true. Even when guys are together, I know they need conversation. Everyone does! However, I'm starting to feel like our conversation is a burden to him... especially since he sucks at it*
Me - "Oh, so is it just a pain to have to have conversations with girls?"
Mr. Bad Conversationalist - "No, because girls have boobs"
Me - * nervous laughter... I have no words for that comment*
Isn't it a given that you don't talk about that kind of stuff on dates... especially a first date with someone you don't really know? Maybe it's just me?
After dinner he wanted to go to the park and talk. I didn't really want to, but figured whatever. At the park, he brought up boobs one more time. What did this do? Just made me self conscious that my boobs were the only thing he was thinking about on this date. I wasn't impressed by this... that's for sure.
He was a nice guy... and I can see how he would probably different at work (which is why my friend wanted to set me up) but... being a 37 year old that had been married before and been in relationships since his divorce... I just expected that he would know how to have good conversation and know that it is not ok to talk about boobs on the first date.
On a positive note... my friend Rich and I were talking about dating a little while ago... and he wanted to make sure I had a good next date and if I didn't he volunteered to dress up like a Genie and grant me wishes. Let me remind you that this was his idea and not mine... but I agreed to it thinking I rarely have a bad date. He wanted to set me up so that he made sure I had a good date, but that double date fell through and this one happened next. I look forward to seeing Rich dressed up like a Genie. :)
3 comments:
I love hearing your date stories. Nothing turns me off more than a grown-ass man talking about boobies on a first date, lol.
I hope the next one is better. I'll take you out. We'll get Mexican food.
Yikes Tracy. Where do these guys come from! I would have been more vocal about not wanting to go to the park. He said himself conversation was lame, yet he wanted to go talk some more at the park??? Blah.
Take a picture of the Genie :)
Oh, poor guy. Hope he never reads your blog. :) So many guys are just awkward when you first get to know them. Dan was SUPER awkward when he started to like me. Of course, he never talked about my BOOBS. (There were a lot of high school guys filling that role, and let me tell you, it never got them anywhere.)
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